Birth To Tentai
by Shiroi Bara
Summary: The birth of Shuiichi Minamino. How ever was the infamous Youko Kurama able to cope with his unfamiliar life as a human? And what's with this voice inside of his head? Is he going crazy!
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own anything!!! Not even Yu Yu Hakusho. Which is VERY mean.  
  
~~~  
  
Prolouge  
  
Human. Is this what I've become? Just because of a selfish act and being shot by a simple hunter? This is NOT what I intended to do with my life. But even as we speak now, I am being reborn in a different life. Oooooo!!!!! Bubbles!!!!!  
  
..... Okay. That was really off track. Dear Inari! I'm gaining the thoughts of a ningen baby still in its womb!   
  
Stupid. A famous theif like me. Reduced to a phathetic human. Oooooo!!!! Lookie! Another bubble!... GARRRR!!!!! THAT'S IT! ONCE MY STRENGTH HAS RETURNED TO ME, I SHALL DESTROY ALL THE WORTHLESS BEINGS OF THE UNIVERSE!!  
  
Crap. What the hell is that light?   
  
...What was that saying again? Follow the light?  
  
NO WAY! It could kill me! NO!!! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?! IT LOOKS SO UGLY!!! EWWWWW!!!!!! IT'S A HAND!!!!! AHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT HAS MY HEAD!!!! INARI!!!!!! ANYBODY, HELP!!!!!!   
  
Oh great. I'm crying again. And why the hell was I screaming?! Why am I still?! Stupid ningen senses. It's just a hand... now on my neck... Is it touching me?!... Nah.   
  
#Do not worry Youko. This is simply the progress of birth.#  
  
Who the hell is that?!  
  
#I am your couscious.#  
  
What?! I have no conscious... At least I think I don't.  
  
#That's because you never listened to me before!!#  
  
What do you mean?! I never even heard you speak before!  
  
#ARRGGGGG!!!! YES I DID!! I was there when you got shot. I told you: 'No Youko! Don't do it! I have a VERY bad feeling about this!'. And you simply flipped me off!#  
  
I don't care about that! JUST GET ME OUT OF THIS PERDICAMENT.  
  
#Youko. Apparently you don't know. This is YOUR birth as a human. It is not a danger to you unless the doctor is drunk, a murderer is in the building, or your human mother has been doing drugs.#  
  
-________-;  
  
"Congratulations Mrs and Mr Minamino. It is a boy."  
  
AHHHHH!!!!!!! What was that?!  
  
#That was the voice of your doctor. Hm... The more you are in this baby body, it seems that you act more like a baby. At least not the Youko I was the conscious of.#  
  
"Look at him dear. He is such a cute baby. We shall call him Shuiichi."  
  
Who was that?! And Shuiichi?! That is the most disgusting name I've ever heard before!  
  
#That was your mother. And Shuiichi... I don't see anything wrong with it.#  
  
Shut up.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
O.O Okay... what did you think of that? Flame me if you wish... 


	2. Walking Is Not ABNORMAL!

OH DEAR GOD!!! THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR REVIEWS!! *cries*  
  
~~~~~~~~~  
  
Walking Is Not ABNORMAL!!!  
  
~~Youko's Mind POV~~  
  
-_____- I still can't believe I'm still stuck in this body. Especially when the stupid idiot won't stop bothering me.  
  
#What do you mean stupid?!#  
  
You got me in this f***ing mess!!  
  
#Well, at least you're still alive ^^;#  
  
About to be eaten in 5 f***ing seconds!  
  
#Aw come on, these puppies are not that scary!#  
  
bWHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN?! THEY ARE TRYING TO SEE WHICH PART OF MY BODY TO EAT FIRST!!/b  
  
Flashback  
  
~~Normal/Youko's Mind POV~~  
  
#C'mon! Let's have some fun!#  
  
*No!*  
  
A little baby with little bits of blood red hair stick hair sat on the floor with a blank face as unknowningly to the others, he was having a very interesting mind converstation.  
  
#It won't hurt you! You can crawl now, so let's go on an adventure!!#  
  
*Are you SURE you're MY conscious?*  
  
#-sweatdrop- Well actually, I'm here because the stupid author knew that you were a very boring person and knew that the readers wouldn't like a boring Youko so she just put me here for no reason...# He mumbled.  
  
*What?*  
  
#NOTHING!!! Nothing.. I swear... He he.. Now... Let's GO!!#  
  
*-sigh- Guess so*  
  
#Now onward to the nudy clubs!!#  
  
*WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!*  
  
#Nothing... #  
  
As the parents was watching the television, the little Shuiichi they knew and loved began crawling away.  
  
#Left.... right..... Left.... right....#  
  
*You know we're just going on a circle now, right?*  
  
#Uh actually, I was watching the girls... But then again, let's go to that alleyway!#  
  
*Why?*  
  
#Hello? Adventure?#  
  
*Fine... What is that growling?*  
  
In front of them were three pairs of eyes, with mouths growling and dripping saliva.  
  
#Don't worry, they're just doggies.#  
  
*Then why are they confronting me?!*  
  
#They might just want to eat you, just walk by them.#  
  
*AHHHH!!! I'm trapped!!*  
  
End Flashback  
  
~~Youko's Mind POV~~  
  
#RUNNNN!!!!!!!!!!#  
  
How?! I'm just a baby you know?!  
  
#JUST RUNNNNN!!!!! That's it! I'm leaving!#  
  
What?! HEY!! Don't you dare leave me alone! ARGGGGGGGG!!!!  
  
Hey... how did I get back to the house?  
  
"Oh Shuiichi!! We've been looking all over for you! Where have you been and how- OH MY GOD! Honey, look, Shuiichi's WALKING!"  
  
"But that's impossible! He's TOO Young!"  
  
What? Oh wait! I'm taller!! YIPPEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!  
  
#See, told you everything would be okay.#  
  
NO THANKS TO YOU! You TRAITOR!!! I shall kill you.  
  
#Doesn't that mean you want to kill yourself?#  
  
I WISH! If I could, I wouldn't be in this perdicament!  
  
"Oh dear, let's get him to the doctor. He should know." A female voice said.  
  
O.O NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! NOT THAT AWFUL PLACE AGAIN!!!! WHERE MY AWFUL NINGEN LIFE BEGAN!!! NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
$$$$  
  
Ow. Ow. Ow. WHY THE HELL IS THAT PATHETIC NINGEN POKING ME?! WAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!  
  
~~~~~~~ 


	3. Big Butts

Author note: XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD Guess how long it took me to remember my password and email for this account? One year! XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD is shot and killed by readers

Big Butts

"Nnnnnnnnnnnn. Nainnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn."

"No, no Shuiichi. Say, Mama. Ma-ma." Shiori said, waving her index finger infront of Shuiichi's nose.

#I DON'T WANNA BE A CHICKEN, I DONT WANNA BE A DUCK. SO I'LL SHAKE MY BUTT-#

--;; -SHUT THE HELL UP, YOU STUPID BASTARD!-

#Why! It's a great and addictive song!#

- INARI! SHUT UP!-

# Che'. PMSing... #

Shuiichi opened his mouth to whine and growl and groan and cry and go crazy with human and demon curse words, but it came out as : "NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"Oh? Do you need a diaper change, little Shuiichi?" She asked, laying him down on a table and checking his bottom.

- Ughhhhhhh... I don't want a ningen woman checking me out! And she's not even hot! -

# Like, oh my god. Like, I knew you were like, such a like, playboy and all. But like, you're just like, A FING BABY! GET YOUR MIND OUTTA THE GUTTER! #

- Oh shush, I bet I got more women in my bed in one hour than you do in a century. -

# Uh huh... But did you ever notice that all the girls you slept with got murdered the next night? #

- I never sleep with the same women twice, how'd they die? -

# RFGITYKC #

- RFGITYKC? Oo? -

The conscious mentally nodded. # Rapid Fan Girls In The Youko Kurama Club #

- OO? I have fangirls! -

# ... You slept with one every single night. They held their club meetings at the bar you always went to at night to pick out girls. Didn't you ever wonder why they went all quizzy when you winked at them? #

- I thought all girls were like that to me... -

# Phfft. Yeah right. They were planning to capture you and make you become their sex slave, but their number decreases every single day because every night a member is killed by the other members. But since you've been gone, their number has increased to over fifty million. #

- And they're planning to overthrow me? -

# Aye. #

- Then I'll just have to sleep with more girls, then. - Youko smirked with thoughts of sex and evil.

# Come now, the readers would get mad. #

- What readers! -

# Ummm... Sorry, that was a typo. #

- Oh... Wait... What typo! -

# Nothing... Forget I ever said that. # It sighed. # I'm surprised you've even remember your past... But how could you forget the beautiful and beautiful Kuronue of the night? #

- Ah yes... He was a beautiful creature... Took me a while to lure him into bed though... Said he wasn't into such a thing... And yet his body tasted so good... -

# You sound like you ate him. O.o; You are a weird bisexual guy. #

- Yup. I loved every part of him. Taking him everynight into bed... I also kinda got tired of women. I even wanted to mark him as my mate... But then he died... I can never stop greiving over that. Inari, I miss him so much... Especially his coc- - He was cut off.

# Aww... I feel so flattered... #

- Wait... You feel flattered? -

# Um... No. I mean Kuronue must feel flattered if he ever heard you say such a thing...#

Silence then lingered between them.

# Hhmmmmm... Hmmm... Hm hm... # It started to hum. # I like big butts and I CANNOT LIE! YOU OTHER - #

- SHUT UP YOU ASSHOLE! -

# - DENY. THAT WHEN A GIRL WALKS IN WITH AN ITTY BITTY WAIST AND A ROUND THING IN YOUR FACE; YOU GET SPRUNG! WANNA PULL UP - #

- SHUT THE $&$#&$&#$&#&$#$&$$$# UP, YOU BEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP ! -

# Sheesh... Someone's not in the mood today. What? You don't like girls with big butts? #

- I did! And I still do! I'm bisexual remember! -

# But your mind was in the gutter of sleeping with Kuronue, wasn't it? All those passionate and lustful nights. Remember, ne? Remember? #

Youko sighed. - Yeah... I remember... -

# So you're gay! #

- WHAT! I THOUGHT LOVE KNOWS NO GENDER! -

# Yeah... but... If you're gay.. Then no girls would go after you... And that makes SB really happy... Knowing that she's an addict to yaoi... #

- SB! WHO THE HELL IS SB! STOP USING CODE WORDS! -

And we'll stop there. I don't feel like I'm in the mood for writing... And I've been so into BL that I forgot to keep this story straight. Oh, fuk that. I'm sleepy... 


End file.
